Geek at the cool table, cool at the geek table. (aspiring2live) wrote,
Geek at the cool table, cool at the geek table.
aspiring2live

A can of worms has been opened...

Walked for the third consecutive day. It hurt me somewhat, coming uphill, 80 plus degree heat, facing into the afternoon sun, carrying my nearly 300 pounds.

The biggest can of worms on earth has been opened. I didn't open it, I can't close it. I just get to watch the worms spread everywhere... huzzah.

I had the weed-eater and the mower serviced early in the spring because they refused to run after the way I treated them all winter. Now, after sitting unused for a good part of the summer (because my neighbor cuts my grass so much!), they are mad at me again. Now they will both run, but only very slowly and without any power. Touch a few blades of grass with them and BRRRRRrrrrrrr r r r r r... What's worse than yard equipment that won't run? I know. I lost control of the back yard early on in the summer and never regained it. Only with the fall will I get some control back there, assuming I can struggle through whatever this is that keeps me down. Depression, I think. I can't seem to care anymore.

I'm listening to a random mix of my crap illegally stolen mp3 collection. Mostly it is tunes I would never pay for anyway. Kurt ends "All Apologies" with the repeated phrase, "All alone is all we are, all alone is all we are, all alone is all we are..." Does anyone else find that to be an unfulfilled fantasy, I wonder? Mental note: make sure that song is never followed again by Pink Floyd's "Shine On You Crazy Diamond." Suicide in a bucket, that is. Bah! It isn't the music. I'm OD'ed on Alleve and slushy Coke and my 3 hour nap left me wanton and melancholy. Okay, I'm sure now what it is. I have to go back to work tomorrow night (now it's tonight!) after 12 days off. BITE.

Mmmmmm. Allie is cooking up some Kielbasa and eggs and it smells gooood! Gotta counter all this healthy walking somehow! My walk went well other than being a bit harsh near the end. I'm still a little sore in the legs but all-in-all not bad. I have to say that I'm not enjoying it quite as much as I did at first though, because I have seen everything already now when I walk. I will have to start walking in different places now to infuse some variety into my views. I have, thus far, stuck to only a couple of favorite routes, mostly because there are many unsavory neighborhoods within walking distance of my house and I don't want to stumble into any of them. I may also drive to some places and walk from there so that I get my hour done with more variety. I can drive a little over 5 minutes and then walk to places I couldn't reach in 30 minutes walking from my house. See! I've been thinking about all this stuff. Must be planning to keep it up.

Oop, time to eat.

"Buy the sky and sell the sky, and tell the sky, and tell the sky. Don't faaaall on meeee!"

REM sings
Tags: aspiring to live, depression, exercise
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