Geek at the cool table, cool at the geek table. (aspiring2live) wrote,
Geek at the cool table, cool at the geek table.

Writing Prompt

I haven't actively sought to do the wrong things in my life very often, though often enough. But I'm not as guilty as some of self-destruction. Sometimes we are guilty of self-destruction for other reasons. I can probably start this by pointing fingers at my parents, my extended family, my elementary school classmates, and maybe even you, if you give me enough time. There is plenty of blame in here for me to pass out and still have a pile for myself. That's one of the things about blame, if you hadn't noticed. You can pass it out all day every day and still have the same amount, or maybe even more, to sleep on for the next day.

Another thing is that even when you place blame exactly where it belongs, it does nothing to solve any problems. You have to overcome the blame. I once heard a line from a "surfer dude" character in a long forgotten movie. "Acknowledge and moove on, dude." That is all blame is good for, to serve as a marker, think of it as a grave stone; it is a marker at the place where you acknowledged the problem, laid the blame aside, and moved on. That said, I'm just about finished placing blame in my life for the things gone wrong.

For my own part, I'm getting a better grasp on the ways I've failed myself and others. I don't know if it is better that most of my failures weren't due to a direct act on my part or not, because the result is still a failure. Inaction is, in many ways, worse than wrong actions because it shows no initiative whatsoever. At least when you fail because you struck out in a bad direction, you were striking out, and attempting to make progress in some direction. Most of my failures have been because I did nothing. I have waited. Afraid for some unknown reason, or lacking the initiative and motivation, I have waited for life to come to me in its fullest; to provide me with my ambitions and the fruits of efforts I was unwilling to start.

Today, and everyday that it is necessary from now on, I want to wake with a small ceremony. I want to place all blame and excuses in a large imaginary hole, cover them as I rise, and boldly stride away from the stone to start my day. I want to be able to look back at that marker and see my progress every day. I want to wait no longer. I owe this to myself and so many others. This is how I will aspire to live. I don't want to can't wait any longer. I can't wait to get started. I have waited, and it got me nowhere.

I have waited
Writing prompt courtesy of

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